On the flip side

G has been on a mission: get to 40 pounds.  At first, the goal was simply to allow her to sit in a booster seat in the car as opposed to a car seat.  Seeing as how she's 6, I figured that was a reasonable aspiration.  And she's a trooper: frequently asking if the food I fix or if finishing her supper will help her reach her target.  I just hope she's not getting programmed to think that any particular number on the scale is somehow better than another ... that weight will be an obsession for her when she's older.

A friend of mine has been very concerned about her little boy, Tristan.  Every few weeks there is an e-mail blast that he's gained (or lost) a few ounces.  She was particularly upset a few weeks ago when he was diagnosed with Failure To Thrive.  As a mom, that's a scary diagnosis for your little one.  Not only does it mean that your beloved child is at risk for a variety of illnesses and developmental delays (both physical and cognitive), but it also made me feel as though I had failed my child in some way.  Afterall, the only responsibility a parent has in the first few years is to see that the kid is safe and healthy ... and much of that is reflected in the child's eating habits and weight.

Tonight I got an e-mail saying that Tristan, her 10 month old baby, finally reached 17 pounds.  Cause for celebration!  Their target for Tristan is 20 pounds by his first birthday.

And I remember when we finally reached that milestone: Nina was a few months old, making Grace about 20 months old at the time.  And I remember how bony she was.  And how sitting on the floor for any length of time or leaning against a wall (or other hard surface) made her sore and gave her bruises.

Years later, we still have to maintain some semblance of an eating schedule, although fortunately we don't have to be nearly so strict about it.  She can skip a snack and it's no big deal.  Dinner can be served at 6:00 or 6:30 rather than precisely 5:30.  She can go without fortified foods and drinks for the most part and not instantly drop weight.  It's good.

So I'll dance a happy dance for Tristan.  And be grateful that he isn't as bad off as Grace was.  And hope Kimberly has good, supportive people  to let her know what a good mom she is.  And in a minute, I'll kiss my little girl goodnight, and pray she knows how much she's loved and that I want nothing more than for her to be happy and healthy and whole.